If you are wondering how to keep your relationship hot and alive with your significant other while having children, you are not alone! When my daughter was born, Valentine’s day was just 8 weeks after her birth. I had about 3 hours of sleep every night for two months, and could barely sleep during the day. When V-day came around, I thought: “Well, if we do something super early, like 5 pm, I might not pass out during dinner.”
When a little one is added to our lives, much of attention and energy goes into caring for your child. How do you make time for dates and everything else? How do you get the energy to connect with your partner?
Don’t panic! Small adjustments can make a significant change in maintaining intimacy alive with your significant other.
The obvious one:
1. Carve some time to go out on a date. Recruit your family, your partner’s family, and people you trust to watch your little ones to go out. Partnering with other couples might be the trick. You can watch their kids one night, and they watch your children another evening. Dates at Home: Limited finances or no one to trust your children to? No worries. How about having a romantic date at home once the children go to sleep? Cook together, watch a movie together, play a game (PG13 or not, wink, wink). This is a solution when outside dates are not possible, and also an option to supplement going out.
2. Flirt as much as possible! Text messaging throughout the day is a way to remain connected. Some couples exchange text messages indicating times that they will commit to one another. Emailing is a great option, too. What these forms of flirting do is keep the thought of spending quality time together in the air and then it is easier to connect in person despite of being tired. When you are at home, regular touch by hugging, caressing, and kissing will increase the feeling of closeness. Thanking your partner for their help and complimenting each other is good, too.
Valentine’s Day is a reminder that our romantic relationship needs to be celebrated! In order to maintain romance and intimacy, we need to make sure that time is dedicated to the relationship. When children are introduced to the mix, time and energy are used differently. Do something special on V-Day or on any other occasion, and with these tips, every day can feel a little bit like romance is in the air. Your significant other will appreciate it, and so will your children.
To The Success of Your Relationship!
Your Therapy Friend,
Sofia Robirosa is the owner of Infinite Therapeutic Services and is a Relationships & Parenting Expert. She offers individual, couples, and family counseling to individuals seeking to enhance their relationships. Her private practice is located in Plantation, FL. She attended Nova Southeastern University for both her Bachelor and Master Degrees in Marriage and Family Therapy and in Business Administration. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and a Leader in Active Parenting for children and teens, an evidenced based program. She is also a Certified Addictions Professional (CAP). She is a passionately committed therapist, who thoroughly takes pride and joy from her job. She enjoys working with a culturally diverse population and is bilingual in Spanish and English. She is a member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and an active volunteer of the Broward Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. She loves her family, which consists of her husband, daughter, and two dogs. Some of her interests outside of work include spending time outdoors, traveling, and dining. Read more about her at: www.infinitetherapeuticservices.com and follow her on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/infinitetherapy/