Learning to live together: Tips for a smoother transition.
Updated: Mar 30
"They are no longer two, but one. Therefore, what God has joined together, let man not separate" (Matthew 19:6)
The adjustment from being in charge of your own life to becoming a part of mutual responsibilities is both challenging and time-consuming. A single person enjoys the freedom to experience life as well as many close relationships prior to a long-term serious commitment. They engage their time in developing themselves and setting priorities. They can explore new ways of thinking, being, and loving and grow more slowly into the kind of people they want to become. Eventually, these young people will come across their “true love” and settle to a more serious commitment. - marriage. Many newlyweds face that married life is not always “rainbows and butterflies,” as cohabitating is a major transition in ones life as we need to learn to share a life with someone new. What is important is that - you will face whatever these struggles as ONE, together and united. There are ways to win this “I” to “WE” transition and nurture the time spent being together.
Communication is the basis of every relationship. You must lay down your needs and discuss how both of you can adjust or find ways to make everything more compatible and liveable. Talking about the issues as they arise and finding your grounds will make the transition a lot easier.
Your husband/wife must be your best friend and confidant; not your friend nor your family. You are bonded by the vow that you will live together; in sickness and in health. for richer and poorer. Anything that is relevant to your relationship must be laid bare. Trust your partner as it holds every relationship.
Support each other in achieving Personal Dreams
Though you are married, you still have dreams for yourself before getting married or even during the course of your marriage. You must still pursue your dreams and make your family your inspiration in achieving this. Having a support system can boost morale and confidence knowing that there is somebody who is there to listen and share achievements.
Keeping Personal Space
Having your personal “ME” time is knowing the boundaries of single life and married life. Your time for yourself can enhance mental health and inner peace. It can break the couple’s daily house routines. The time away from each other will give a new perspective about the relationship which brings more intimacy and understanding of married life.
Plan your Future
Getting married means having to plan your future together. Discuss things like; how many kids do you want, where to live, size of the house, money matters, and many other things which can affect your relationship in the long run. When you talk about the future and how you both want it, you set your mind on things that you need and want. You have common goals that you are looking forward to achieving together.
It is beautiful when people of different cultures, upbringing, and opinions can joyfully commit to a long-term relationship. It is a journey to learn to manage the transition from being single to having someone to share the bed with every night. Sharing life experiences, learning each other’s secrets, listening to unsaid words, and knowing your love language are life enriching experiences. Every relationship is complex and unique; but understanding each other and knowing the role to play will be the most life-changing part of every couple.